I was stirred up by a discussion on JPR's blog. And had too much to say to limit myself to just one comment.
So, here's a whole bunch of my comments!
What I think being a feminist means…
This is in response to Jenica’s blog. I had written a lengthy comment and then it didn’t post. So I feel compelled to weigh in and try to be articulate in this discussion.
So, here it goes:
I do consider myself a feminist. I think that women should have equal access to job opportunity, to equal pay for equal work, and women can and should be as “power hungry” as their male counterparts. So, here are some thoughts that are listed in no particular order.
I don’t think all men are evil and want to keep women out of the proverbial Board Room. I do think that men, especially white men, are raised in a society that says they should and can have power. They should make the rules. Women have a harder time seeing themselves in position of power and authority; we are given a different script than men.
I don’t think women who choose to stay home with their children are demonstrating some anti-feminist attitude. I think women who stay home are exercising their right to make decisions for their families. And I feel that it is my responsibility as a woman to fight for rules that benefit all women.
I don’t like it when I get shit for being a working mom. I don’t want to stay home with my children and bake cookies (I do bake cookies by the way). I want to wear a suit every day. I want to climb the power ladder. I want to be at the table making decision and fighting with white males for a place. I want to be paid equally. I want to be respected as a smart female, not objectified as someone’s sex object (that has happened more than once in my professional career). And I want other women to respect that it is my choice to work.
We need women elected to state legislatures, to Congress, and to the White House because women who govern create policy that is radically different than the policy men create (this crosses partisan lines). Women who create policy are more likely to fund education, quality health care, community programs for lower income families, and policy that is more “for the common good.” Men tend to favor policy that benefit corporate interests; policy that isn’t necessarily good for communities. They will spend more of our tax dollars on building prisons, homeland security, funding corporate tax breaks, and military spending.
Women need to govern because we need to protect Roe V. Wade and our right as women to make choices about reproduction. This is not a pro-abortion stance…this is my stance that I think women are smart enough to make choices that effect their lives. In WI right now there is a bill in the legislature that would allow doctors to lie to pregnant women about the results of their pregnancy test if they believe they might seek an abortion. There is a bill that would deny low-income women access to birth control through Medicaid. These attitudes completely fly in the face of believing that women are capable and smart enough to make decisions for themselves (which by the way, we are!). I don’t want a white male dominated state legislature making laws that allow doctors to lie to me if they want to or allow pharmacists to refuse to fill my birth control because they think any type of contraception is wrong. We need women who trust other women. Period.
I hope that women my age don’t forget the real sacrifices and fights that other women have gone through in their lives to create a place for us at the table. I don’t ever want to forget that there was a time when women had very limited professional roles (nurses, teachers, secretaries, etc). I don’t want to forget the women that took tons of sexual harassment in the office place and dared to speak out so that I can work in a (mostly) safe work environment. I want to continue to work so that my daughters do grow up with an image that women can wear a suit—demand (and get) respect, and can be in places of authority. I also want them to know that if they choose to stay home and raise children and if they find meaning and joy in other types of vocation that is wonderful too. I want them to understand that being a woman can mean all things.
I think all women need to stand up for the choices that women can and should make.
We should all stop bitching about each other and start affirming the many roles that women can and should play in our communities; we need all of us! We need the power-hungry women in the board rooms (me) and we need the moms who are guardians of our communities (I know many!). And we need to be aware enough to say “thank you” to our counterparts for what role they are playing in shaping society. So, to all the women who are home raising children, volunteering at my children’s schools, babysitting my kids when I am in a late night meeting, THANK YOU. Your work allows me to do my work! I'll continue to fight for policy that makes the world a better place for all of us, that makes the workplace fair for women, that promotes quality schools and health care, and I will model women in powerful positions for our daughters.
Hopefully my daughters will both grow up seeing that women can be nurturers and power brokers. And maybe even do both in the same day!
And that is what I think it means to be a feminist!
